Developing Emotional Intelligence

Last week, the company which conducted the psychometric test, a compulsory pre-requisite needed to enter Medicine, gave a seminar with feedback and methods to develop emotional intelligence. To be selected for an interview, candidates needed to perform in the top 20 percentile. While they assured us there were 'no right or wrong' answers, the answers provided by students provided typical qualities and characteristics 

Why is Emotional Intelligence Important?

People with well-developed emotional intelligence (EI) can create and manage relationships more effectively. They can work well with others, regulate their emotions appropriately, understand how others are feeling, and influence and inspire people.

Emotional intelligence influences the quality of interpersonal relationships. It can improve the experience of stress, pressure and conflict, and enhance decision-making. Studies have also shown that it increases positive attitudes towards work and enhances altruistic feelings, while people with lower EI demonstrated poorer ability to cope with stressors at work.

Examples of Emotionally Intelligent Behaviour

• Adapting behaviour to match or enhance the emotions of others
• Mindful use of emotions during interpersonal interactions to convey specific feelings and build rapport with others
• Self-regulating own reactions to emotions
• Objectively managing the influence that emotions have on behaviour
• Empathising with others
• Coordinating and managing others who may be experiencing a wide range of emotions

Steps to improve your Emotional Intelligence

While it is true that emotional intelligence can be improved, some have argued that it’s not an easy task and there’s no quick fix. People need to be dedicated and committed to improving their ability and must invest energy into change over time. Change will generally come about with continued practice, with new skills learned and reinforced over time. The points summarised below, based on the seminar, are some behaviours that can help you improve.

Perceiving Emotions

• Pay Attention - Listen and look
• Process verbal & non verbal information
• Look for consistency or inconsistency between words & tone & expression
• Don’t be thrown off the track by discrepancies e.g., People laugh when grieving;
• Personal self-awareness - Process your own emotional reactions
• Reflect to the person using language. Can also check with another observer
• Get more information – context

Facilitating Thought

• Become more aware of how thoughts influence emotions
• Understand how different emotions can benefit or hinder different situations
• Change moods and emotions based on the requirements of the situation
• Use emotions to influence and energise others
• Generate different emotions by using emotional imagery or past experiences.

Understanding Emotions

• Develop an extensive emotional vocabulary
• Understand how emotions change and develop over time
• Understand how emotions blend and combine to form other emotions
• Find out the reason why certain emotions are experienced
• Predict the consequences of emotions not being handled effectively

Managing Emotions

• Be aware of feelings and emotions
• Act on feelings in a considered way
• Remain open to feelings, even if they are painful or uncomfortable
• Move between positive and negative moods as required
• Use emotion management techniques such as writing about emotions or exercising

Things to Consider

• The following outlines specific development suggestions on how to develop specific abilities related to emotional intelligence
• Activities are designed to be useful for all individuals
• The level of emotional intelligence between individuals differs and thus the outcomes of the suggested development strategies may also vary between individuals
• Use the development suggestions with recommendations in the MSCEIT Emotional Intelligence for Development Report
• Developing emotional intelligence typically requires long term effort, self-awareness the use of a variety of strategies

Perceiving Emotions

Effective social communication requires accurate perceptions of content as well as emotion. Emotions can be expressed in a variety of ways such as voice tone and non-verbal signals (i.e., posture and facial expression) and though the environment. Sometimes a quick read of the emotions present in the face and the environment is more accurate than a lengthy, analytical approach to the task. Consider the following when aiming to improve perceiving and identifying own and others’ emotions:

• Be attentive to emotions expressed in yours and others faces, voice and body language.
• Be mindful of the environment – e.g. emotions expressed by artists, ambience of rooms
• Check perceptions of emotions with others
• Take time to consider emotions conveyed in art, sounds and objects
• Check verbal information against non-verbal information. E.g. Is what the person is saying matching their expressions and gestures?

Facilitating Thought

Our thinking patterns are influenced by our emotions, such that thinking does not occur without emotion. There are times when emotions can enhance our thinking, and other times when emotions may interfere. Review the following examples of how specific emotions can facilitate better thinking patterns.

How to generate emotions to facilitate better thinking?

The key to using emotions to facilitate thought is to be able to generate different emotions when they are required. Therefore, it is important to be able to move from a sad mood to a happy mood when we want to be creative. Consider the following steps to help generate different moods.

• Visualise and remember a time when you experienced a happy/sad mood. What happened? How did you react? How did this affect the clarity of your thoughts, accuracy of your judgement? When recalling memories and past experiences of emotions, it is most effective to remember as many details as possible, such as taste, smell, and sounds.
• Take a few moments to relax and become aware of current moods and/or emotions. This will help focus your attention towards how you feel at the time and enables the change of behaviour, style, and thinking to generate a different emotion.

Use imagination through guided imagery to create different moods and emotions. For example, to generate a happy mood, think of events, places, people, and experiences that evoke happiness and joy.

Understanding Emotions

Underpinning a solid understanding of emotions is our level of emotional knowledge. Emotional knowledge refers to knowledge of emotional language, the differences between emotions, and how emotions change and evolve. In order to understand emotions and increase emotional knowledge, it is important to become aware of the cause of emotions. Below are typical causes of common emotions.

Managing Emotions

The ability to manage emotions refers to being able to regulate and remain open to emotions rather than ignoring or avoiding them. Emotions contain important information about ourselves and others, being closed to some emotions may lead to the misjudgment or oversight of this information. Emotions direct our attention to problems or issues that may exist and inform us of what to focus on.

Learning to manage feelings and emotions begins with becoming more aware of current habits and typical reactions for coping with strong emotions. Consider the following steps in situations where you may need to manage emotions.

Strategies to Manage Emotions

Environment

• Removing yourself from the environment that is causing an unwanted emotion and putting yourself in another another environment can help with managing some emotions.
• The downside to this strategy, is that the information that emotions provide about ourselves, others, and avoiding the situation are likely to be lost.

Physical

• Incorporating exercise into a daily routine may be an effective way to manage negative moods and emotions.
• A short walk is often enough to calm us down and restore our energy levels when we are feeling angry, overwhelmed, or a bit flat.
• Deep Breathing techniques and self-awareness to help calm down physiological aspects of emotion.

Brain

• Changing the way we view a situation by changing perspectives can be a useful technique to manage emotions.
• When we anticipate that emotional control will be required such as before for a stressful event, we can change perspectives to prepare effectively for the event.

Relationships

• Discussing emotions with people that we trust can help with identifying and understanding emotions.
• Social support allows you to ask for feedback, identify and confirm the causes and consequences of emotions.
• This form of support can help people validate emotions.